Sunday, October 16, 2011

Prayers can inspire as much as they can heal

When I was four years old, I prayed to God for chocolates and candies. As I grew, academics became a big part of my life. I prayed for the top rank in my class every term. When I turned ten, I suddenly got aware of how bad this big world is and how helpless I was without my parents. My prayers abruptly took the shape of earnest requests to God for their well-being and safety. Worries overtook me so much that at times I wished they would outlive me!

The teen years came and brought with them a basket of emotions….and problems too. So when the neighbourhood boy, an acquaintance till the other day, turned into almost a stranger overnight, because the girls had discovered his boyish charm and began swooning over him, I got jealous and dejected alternately. And so started my new prayers for a fair complexion and a voluble tongue to get noticed. Needless to say, the prayers went unheard and I went deep into my books with a vengeance. A star performance in the board exams would eventually get me the attention and importance due to me, I told myself. My good scores helped me commence my engineering studies. The neighbourhood boy was now a distant memory.

My prayers no longer had the razor-sharp edge, though I still prayed, because prayers had become a routine part of my life. My college life was nearing its end, and I slowly got more and more aware of my parents’ desire to see me start off my career with a bang. Would I be able to live up to their dreams? Would my degree fetch me what they wished for me? I took refuge in prayers again. This didn’t end even when I landed my first job with a decent company. Every job-switch I made followed days of earnest prayers. As I prayed for a better future, I began believing more and more in my potential.

Prayers were becoming my inspiration….to do better and better.

Later in life, I prayed when I was to become a first-time mother. But fate struck and soon I was mourning my unborn child whom I had lost within three months of conception. Shaken and wounded, as I underwent several medical tests to ensure smooth pregnancy, my prayers became passionate pleas to God to bless me with a normal, healthy child. When my son came to this world, bringing with him tonnes of hope and joy, I felt truly blessed. His arrival after months of wait convinced me some prayers do get answered. That was the first time prayers came across to me as something with a power that surpassed every other source of power. I realize today the thanksgiving prayers of a woman who had just been gifted with motherhood after a long, anxious wait were silently healing her wound.

Overnight my prayers altered. I began praying for our family. The prayer content too changed. It was no longer an ambitious prayer for better career and more money. The time had come to thank God for everything, feel blessed and pray for a good life for my son. Today, when I am doubly blessed with a daughter, I pray for the four of us, and our near and dear ones. My prayers help me calm down, pause for a while, forgive myself and others and leave my worries behind me to carry on with my day with vigour and without anxiety. Not that I have finally stopped asking God for anything. I pray that we raise our children well, that they emerge as good human beings, that we perform our duties, that we do well what we are here for.

My children, aged close to ten and four, participate in prayers with me, filling me with hope that prayers will become an integral part of their life too. As they grow, they will learn to pray independently and some day they will have their own prayers. I just hope during turbulent times, each of the two draws strength from prayers and comes out stronger and purer. Amongst the things that I would like to leave behind for my children, prayer is something that would hopefully top the list.
What worries me though is in today’s fast-paced life where the children too are forced to run like their parents, where the young ones have to pack in a long list of activities, will prayers be able to find even a little room in their busy week days? We talk about meditation and yoga, even the schools have begun to squeeze them in between classes, but how much do we emphasize on prayers today? Do our children know a prayer could begin a day as well as end it? That a quick prayer can dissolve a lot of tension and stress? That praying doesn’t snatch away much time, even a minute is fine, for it would soothe a disturbed, tense mind undoubtedly, as slowly and silently the burden of worrisome thoughts would be taken away?

Let us hope our children, ensconced in the comforts a rapidly growing Indian city, and matching their pace with today’s fast life, while gearing up to keep running fast as adults, do not forget that prayers can inspire as much as they can heal….that prayers can be a permanent part of life.


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